When one loses hope, part 1

to the Centers A ccording for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), suicide is the eleventh leading cause of death in America.

For every person who kills himself or herself, another twenty-five attempts are made. White males are victims more than any other demographic. When one loses hope, the impact is cruel, devastating and eternal for all.

During my research for this series, I came across an obituary of a young man who ended his life because of his suffering. The following is word for word of his obituary as it was published in the Earle Enterprise newspaper on 11 February 1938.

“Ferdinand Seboly, Jr., 24, who lived with his parents’ north of Earle, ended his life Tuesday, using a shotgun to almost completely blow his head away. The deceased had been in ill health for more than a year, suffering intense agony at times, which prompted his self-destruction. Funeral services were conducted in the Holt Funeral Home here by Rev.

Hughey, pastor of the Earle Methodist church. Burial was in Calvary Cemetery in Memphis, Wednesday, with Holt and Son, local undertakers in charge of arrangements.”

I include Mr. Seboly’s obituary because it highlights the despair and tragedy of this topic. No matter the circumstances, when someone self-destructs the burden of unanswerable questions, guilt and grief overwhelms those who are left behind. Suicide is not a new phenomenon; however, suicide is on the rise for several reasons.

My hope is that this short series will help others to confront it. I know this subject well. I have had to wrestle with this issue personally and professionally, I have faced the unanswerable question – Why?

I knew a man who made a series of bad decisions.

He robbed an armored car and when the law finally caught up with him, he spent years in prison. After “paying his debt to society” he was released. The man attempted many times, unsuccessfully, to find a job. But who would hire a thief? Who would trust a thief with valuable resources? No one. Was he desperate, depressed, angry? “Why did he do that?” were the questions asked. When the man pulled his gun during a failed attempted robbery, the officer did what he was trained to do, what he should have done, what he had to do, there was no other choice for the officer.

The officer shot the man.

The officer did not know what the man knew. The man had pulled out a plastic toy gun and aimed it at the officer.

The man was an example of “suicide by cop” and unfortunately the officer pays a price for the man’s decision to end his own life by the hand of the officer.

Suicide always affects others, always. The man was my brother. My family, especially my parents, continue to pay a high price of regret, loneliness, and unanswered questions. I pray you never experience the pain of suicide in your family, the questions are never fully answered.

Suicide is often the result of months of planning, at other times it is a split-second decision. It could be circumstances, loneliness, choices made, stress, depression, a chemical imbalance, anger, loss, rage, unfulfilled expectations, abuse by others or simply the hardships of life. Each of these can bring a person to the precipice of suicide.

Eternal choices are made in the blink of an eye and having a few seconds more, another choice would be made.

When one loses hope, suicide enters the mind so easily. Suicide is a lie; it is the perfect wrong answer.

To the victim of self-destruction, suicide appears as the only way of escape from pain, loneliness, feelings, or despair.

In the Bible, there are people who lost hope and dealt with the issue of suicide. Judas, one of the original, handpicked disciples, walked with Jesus, was so overcome with guilt, shame, and sorrow for his betrayal of Jesus that he hung himself. (Matthew 27:3-5) King Saul, the first king of ancient Israel was so insecure, prideful, and unable to live up to the false expectations of others, believed he was a failure, took his sword and “… fell on it.” (1 Samuel 31:4).

Samson, a judge of ancient Israel, was misled by his selfish desires, he was prideful, and dancing with danger fell to his passionate desires. Samson died by his own hands in an act of revenge and punishment against his enemies (Judges 15:25-30).

Elijah, the great prophet of God, after performing one of the greatest miracles recorded in the Bible was verbally threatened and being physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted, ran from his trouble. Elijah ran to hide in a cave and asked God to take his life.

God did not grant Elijah’s request, instead, God spoke to Elijah firmly but with gentleness and directed him back to what he had run away from with a new mission (1 Kings 19).

The Bible is not silent about suicide. The Bible speaks of life, and life more abundantly! The Ten Commandments instructs us on how to live life, have joy, self-worth, self-respect, and good relationships.

Jesus, in His Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) speaks to life, purpose, consequences, goals, rewards and more.

The Proverbs and other Scriptures contain true principles useful to form our thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs for the critical issues of life and for the subject of suicide.

What is your belief about suicide? Will the person who takes his or her life go to heaven or hell? What Scripture can you recite to support your belief?

If you have no Scripture to base your belief, why do you believe what you believe? Could your belief be wrong?

God’s Word has the answers, encouragement, and wisdom we need to help the one who has lost hope. God and His Word are about life, forgiveness, mercy, grace, and acceptance.

Please join me for the next two weeks as we examine suicide and The Bible.

Clayton P. Adams, West Memphis, Arkansas, email: claytonp adamslll@gmail.com.

Clayton Adams

Time in the Word